Saturday, August 1, 2009

Misrepresentation

I was just rereading this post about when the Indigo Girls came to Northampton because someone added a new comment yesterday.

I'm a little bit offended that the person who commented (scroll down to the comments) felt like she had to tell me that not all lesbians wear khaki, like I might be some kind of lesbian-hating, Indigo-girls-concert-attending nutjob. Which is fine, I guess, but even after I wrote her that mostly friendly reply to her comment, it's sticking in my craw.

Oh, I have a craw all right. And it feels weird to me that I feel like I need to defend myself. Like I have to prove that I'm not a total bigot-asshole or something. WTF is wrong with me?

Me and some of my ladies were talking about how we don't think anyone is all the way gay or all the way straight, blahblahblah, Kinsey Scale blahblahblah. I said something along the lines of how when push comes to shove, I really am only interested in men, but I've had crushes on a few ladies. J. Bo said something along the lines of, "The real test is if you've ever acted a fool over a lady." We all took a moment for introspection and I had to admit, I've acted a fool a fool over one lady, and I acted borderline a fool over another.

I was performing at a women's comedy festival some time back and I was made an honorary lesbian the other ladies in the show. Does that count?

(Aside: I was made an honorary Jew once too, but that was separate.)

Also, I host and produce all-ladies comedy shows. I mean, come on!

And not to put too fine a point on it: I own a pair of khaki pants. Granted, the zipper busted out of them about four years ago. But I've kept them! Indeed, I intend to repair them (or pay a lady to do so).

Meanwhile, in rereading that post, I realized I made an error. I have actually seen the Indigo Girls three times. Once at the Mullins Center in Amherst like 10 years ago with a Jesus-lovin' lady I grew up with who didn't believe me when I told her the Indigo Girls were lesbians ("They can't be," she said. "They're Christian!"), once at the Newport Folk Festival (I can't remember exactly when, but I was with Sunni Zuniga at the time, if that's any indication), and once at the Pines Theater at Look Park with I-have-no-idea-who (sorry if it was you). The Pines was the last one, the one where I gave up on ever hearing them play Galileo live. I really like them, just not enough to go to a crowded show. I don't have that in me anymore.

I hope this gives me the street cred I need to not have to feel like I have to defend myself to that lady anymore. I mean, she's a stranger and you are my friends! Why am I even doing this?

Thank you. That is all.

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